and he was successful in doing so. Previously I hadn’t done anything to hurt or harm him in anyway. If anything, I would have been used to this being part of my normality, but this time I knew I needed courage to change things for the better. I needed to voice this wasn’t acceptable; the only way to do that was to hold him accountable for his actions instead of blaming myself for the impact of his behaviour.
There were several more occasions when I had to face Darren again and do the same thing over and over again. There were times I would crumble. I would break down in tears and be distraught over what I had done. I would feel guilty and horrible inside although he had never shown me any kind of remorse ever. Then I would remind myself of why I had to do this for me, and I guess for him. Lillian called it going