hormone issues worsened, and I felt beaten inside that my body would not produce a child. It killed me when I was outside and saw a family together with a young child. I couldn’t help being drawn to them. I longed to hold my own child in my arms and feel them nestle next to me as they slept but I knew somewhere deep down I would remain motherless.

One day I plucked up the courage to ask him if we could adopt and didn’t expect the answer that I received… stating ‘no’ would have been too simple. Instead, he decided to stand in front of me berating and hurling abuse in my face.

I couldn’t absorb it anymore…I would just lay down on my bed in the bedroom and cry myself to sleep.

He never checked up on me, never